Cultural Scars

A few weeks ago I was listening to the audiobook version of Lee Child's Tripwire. A lot of the story takes place in and around the World Trade Center in New York. It surprised me how hard it was to listen to events staged in a building that no longer existed. As a result, I became acutely aware of the scars we bear as a culture.

When we write we are told to make sure our characters are well-rounded, that they have a past, and plans for their future. The same thing's true for the world in which our characters live.  Each society has its triumphs, dirty secrets, and tragedies. How they affect us, the characters in our own stories, depends on who we are and how remote those events are from us.

For Americans, our cultural scars include the assassination of John F. Kennedy, the race riots of the 1960s, the war in Vietnam, the Challenger explosion, and the September 11 attacks. Each one of these events fundamentally changed how we function as a culture and interact with the world around us. But, there's something else you need to notice about the list. Off the top of my head, I only included events that occurred in my lifetime, or slightly before it. I didn't include the Civil War even though it changed, well, everything, about a young country.

If my grandparents were still with us, I'm sure they'd have included the Great Depression on the list of cultural scars. How did living through the Depression alter how my grandparents interacted with the world around them? They didn't spend money on things they didn't need to. They didn't accumulate "stuff" just to do it. My mother's parents hid cash around the house - although not under the mattress -  because they didn't trust banks. They paid cash for everything and didn't trust or use credit cards either. But I didn't live through the Great Depression. I'm two generations removed from it. So, while I know the lessons from the Depression, I also lived through the "me" generation of the 1980's where the mantra of the day was "why delay gratification? The good times will never end?" Well, they did.

To me the 9/11 attacks were more about the end of American innocence rather than the Kennedy assassination. Yes, we could be touched here in America. Our streets can look like those over seas where unrest is common. The September 11 terrorist attacks created a culture of fear. Politicians now sell it. They get elected because of it. One where we willingly sacrifice our civil liberties and outage at governmental prying for the illusion of "safety." I often wonder if my grandchildren will think the benefit was worth what we gave up.

Okay, sorry I drifted off topic. Back to my point.

Cultures are people too. They have pasts and scars. Those scars in turn inflict invisible wounds on the members of that society. The best stories are recognize this. Kevin J. Anderson's Saga of the Seven Suns has several rich cultures that hide scars. Jora'h, one of my favorite characters from the story, must confront  his culture's despicable acts, and decide whether to bear those scars at the cost of his values or expose those secrets and endanger his people. Each race has a secret that drives its society and present policy/ actions. A culture's present responsibility for its earlier choices is one of the themes in the series. Kevin's consideration and interweaving of these macro-issues makes him one of the best world builders out there.

Paradigm shifts happen when those wounds hit a critical mass and result in change. We change because of our cultural past as much as society changes because of what we do. Our writing should reflect the world around our character, and that world has scars that carve rivulets into its people's souls.

I Spit In Your Eye . . . Or Not

Conflict. It's an inevitable part of life. As a result, it's a necessary part of a story. Amazing characters only take you so far. It's when those amazing characters interact and oppose each other that a story is born.

Keep in mind that everyone reacts differently to conflict. I picked the picture I did for this post because it shows three different responses to an argument. The woman in the foreground is trying to avoid and ignore. The woman in the back is defensive. The man is aggressive. Just like my friends don't respond to martial conflict like my husband and I do, everyone responds to conflict, both the anticipation of the fight and the disagreement itself differently.

In my day job, conflict and its resolution is what I do. You would think this would make me  ready for a fight once I punch that proverbial (and invisible, in my case) clock to switch from work to home. It doesn't. My husband's also an attorney. But our at-home conflict style is very different than what you might expect. We've had an agreement since we married not to use litigation tactics on each other to "win" fights at home. One of our friends has the right to tell her lawyer husband that he's harassing her and he needs to leave the room. He goes when she tells him. Both marriages have lasted more than 15 years. The conflict and resolution mechanisms work, or don't, for the particular couple based on who we are.

We've all dealt with the passive-aggressive fighter, or the persuasive bully. Most of us have been micromanaged or been asked to take an approach to an problem we don't agree with by a superior. Have you ever argued with a psychopath? It's an interesting experience. First, a psychopath generally isn't going to get obviously angry. If you catch a psychopath in a lie, she'll pause and then glibly switch topics. The best way to fight with a psychopath is not to engage.

Does your MC wait all day to confront her ad executive boss who's stolen her idea? What happens when the boss blows off that meeting for a hair cut? The movie Working Girl (1988) has two great conflict scenes. First, when Katherine Parker (Sigourney Weaver) bursts into a meeting to expose Tess (Melanie Griffith) as an idea stealing secretary. Tess, our heroine, doesn't stand up for herself. Instead, Tess, mutters and apology and leaves the meeting in disgrace. Cut to the next day. Now, when Katherine confronts Tess about her "theft" in front of only one witness (the love interest, Harrison Ford), Tess fights back. She tells Katherine that while she may fool the NY types, not to BS her about what really happened. The two scenes illustrate nicely how the same person reacts differently to the same conflict in two different settings.

Every interaction has some level of conflict. Many conflicts arise from misunderstandings. Let's take Mary and John again. They are moving from their cramped one bedroom apartment to their dream house. This should be one of the happiest days in their lives. But even here, there's conflict. John's doing all the heavy lifting and telling Mary to get out of his way. He knows she has a bad back from a car accident and doesn't want her to get hurt. He also wants her free to tell him where the furniture goes so he only has to move it once. Not understanding that John is only trying to protect and help her, Mary feels diminished, slighted, cut out and hurt.

It's not enough to say: "Mary was angry. Did John think she was an invalid?" This is telling. The word "angry" in the sentence conveys nothing to the reader about how Mary is actually feeling.

Is her gut clenching? Is she on the verge of tears? Is a headache brewing? Does she feel alternately hot and cold? Was the build up to the fight worse than the actual fight? Does the conflict roll off Mary's shoulders or does she feed the ember of hurt to make the next blow up bigger? Will she avoid confronting John because her own parents had fought constantly, and she vowed not to fight in front of her kids?

When it's time to put a conflict on the page, we need to think about all these factors. A character's response to conflict has to be consistent with who he is and the situation he finds himself in. Remember to show your reader the internal and physical responses to the coming confrontation, and the actual conflict - whether big or small.  Remember how you felt and use those experiences to enrich your writing.

A Change of Direction- Terror and Hope

Change is hard, and I'm not a big fan of it. Sometimes though, change is necessary. Last week, I resigned from the law firm where I'd been working these last 7 months. So, as of February 1, 2013, I'm on my own.

I'm terrified and thrilled. It's an odd combination of emotions, and at different times one wins out over the other. There's a lot to do between now and Friday to set up the firm. Oh yes, and I still need to work on cases, write, spend time with family and address all the lovely things that children bring into my life.

Making my administrative "to do" list was daunting and reassuring. I know what I have to do, and meeting deadlines is what I do for a living. I can't really complain about the short time frame because I picked it. While the next several months are likely to be harried and financially difficult, in the long run I'll be better off. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Sometimes walking the path less traveled is what we need to do. I'm betting on myself now. I can do this. Just watch me.